There are a number of reasons why I love the holidays. First, the Christmas season ( which, for me, officially begins the first time I hear "This Christmas" by Donnie Hathaway). Then there is the second most important holiday of the year, my birthday (December 28, in case anyone wants to send monetary gifts, feel free to do so via PayPal). Finally, it's CHRISTMAS BREAK!! Only a college professor gets one month off every year for the Christmas holiday (did I mention I love my job??)!!
Most students look forward to this break as well. Who wouldn't want a month away from school, with no worries about classes, waking up early, or studying?? However, for some students (and parents) this can be the most stressful time of the year, and for many college professors, it can become the most annoying time of the year...the last week of classes...
Why would professors find this time so annoying you ask?? Because this becomes "bargain season," the time when students you've never seen in office hours before are waiting at your door 15 minutes before we arrive to discuss how they were supposed to graduate this semester...HOWEVER, our class is the roadblock that is preventing them from doing so. Never mind that they rarely showed up to class on time, if at all, never turned in a homework assignment, and never attempted to study. That's irrelevant. At this point, it's about negotiating. You see, they need to graduate. They have a job offer, this is the last class they needed, or they can't afford to spend any more money at the university. In any case, they need the professor to "give them a grade" so they can meet graduation requirements. I walked into my office this morning to find my retired colleague (who uses my office for office hours since he's teaching my class this semester) explaining to a student that he won't "give" him any grade he doesn't earn. Mind you, this is a supposed-to-have-graduated-two-years-ago senior.
I have a special love-hate this special week of the year...for the simple reason that I explain to my class at the beginning of every semester NOT to ask me at any time what they can do to improve their grade..because my response will initially be, "your work." Further questions will be ignored.
Here is my advice to current college student. DO YOUR WORK! YOU are accountable for your progress. Your effort (or lack of) will EARN you the grade you receive. Trying to win brownie points or last-minute plea deals may get you through a class, but it will stop you in your career and life. You see, once you graduate, you actually WANT a job in that career? Imagine how embarrassed you will feel when you can't perform work or answer questions that a freshman in your major should know? Furthermore, stop wasting our (fellow professors) time with questions about why we won't just give you a passing grade and instead spend it asking questions about concepts you don't understand because you never took the time to read the book until last week.
But I digress. Maybe those are just my own encounters (though I doubt it). Now that I also have experience teaching K-12 students, I've learned that these "little monsters" weren't created by Lady Gaga fans. Nope, they were created by their sponsors...parents who have stopped holding kids accountable for their performance (or lack of) and instead hold teachers accountable for not giving their child extra time to make up missed assignments that they didn't turn in on time, or to do extra credit to help "improve their grade."
See..the beauty of teaching undergraduates is that the FERPA keeps me from having to speak to most parents who want to plead for their child. However, in middle school, that's not the case. In fact, I HAVE to meet with parents. And what I'm learning, is that so many of you parents are doing a disservice to your child. Sure, you have a great career and can provide your children the finer things in life. However, what happened to the basics? Like being accountable for your actions, accepting a loss and working to improve on it the next time or...wait for it...I dare say...studying and actually understanding the material!! Now THERE's a concept that's innovative!!!
Now, if you think I'm being offensive then my guess is you are either that type of college student or parent. The truth is, if you are either or, then you should IMMEDIATELY do a self-reflection, and change your ways. Otherwise you (or even worse, your child) will suffer the consequences. Til next time! **stepping off soapbox**
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
The "Real" World, Housewives, Basketball Wives, and Disservice They are Providing Our Students
I'M BACK!!! After a short break, I'm back and ready to provide more commentary during this all-too important time of the year...NO, not the holidays, COLLEGE ADMISSIONS!! That's right folks, November-March is prime season for high-school seniors and parents. I will be posting at least twice per week to help anyone going through this hectic season (and you thought Black Friday and Christmas shopping was stressful)!!!.
Unfortunately though, I have to bring light to a subject that many college-bound and current undergraduates are dealing with. This past weekend, a Frostburg State University student was killed by another student at an off-campus residence. The victim was trying to break up a fight between the attacker and another student, and was stabbed in the head.
I should also note that all parties involved in this incident were female. In September, you may remember me blogging about a Bowie State University student being murdered by her roommate after a fight over an iPod. It has come to my attention that there is a serious issue going on with our young women in this society. Then there is the murder of Jayna Murray in Bethesda, MD at a Lululemon store by her female employee who stabbed her over 300 times, then proceeded to tie herself up and claim that robbers vandalized the store and attacked them both.
I am the first to admit that I sometimes act on my emotions before thinking things through. I may say something that I wish later I'd counted to 10 and then addressed. Is it because I'm a woman? My boyfriend would say yes, but I do recognize it's a flaw that I work daily to address. However, even on my most emotional day, I've never acted in the type of rage that seems to easily fill in so many young ladies now. It's the kind of emotion that each of the three attackers in the incidents above claim allowed them to "black out" and not realize the extent of what they were doing.
That's a bunch of crap. The truth is that, we as a society are so desensitized to violence that we now think it's acceptable for people, and girls and young ladies, to carry themselves in a violent manner that it's acceptable for people to justify their actions by "I just snapped."
How many of you have watched The Real Housewives series, The Real World, Jersey Shore, Basketball Wives, Football Wives, Bad Girls Club, or the host of other "reality" shows that are overtaking EVERY SINGLE ONE of the television channels now? I confess that I've watched some of these, and commented on the sheer ignorance of not only the "reality stars" but us as a society for allowing network television to continuously feed us such nonsense that they package up as "entertainment" because they think we are too stupid to demand more.
The truth is, they are right. We are not holding our entertainment outlets accountable to us by providing programming that educates, entertains, and helps us grow as a people. Remember Family Ties, The Cosby Show, A Different World, Happy Days, Family Matters, The Wonder Years, etc.? While these all weren't designed to educate us, they were at least television shows that portrayed positive moral values, and characters learning a valuable lesson at the end of each episode (which somehow always brought the "feel-good-music" and "a-ha moment").
Now, young women become overnight celebrities not for their acting ability, but their ability to make the biggest scene, cause the biggest fight in public, or be the most drunk on television, or cause the biggest Twitter or Facebook feud. This is what so many of our teens and 20-somethings see and think is appropriate. Throwing drinks, fighting in public, getting loud, and making a fool of themselves and everyone else around them. It's ok because the Snookie's, J-Wow's, Evelyn's, Tami's, and Bad Girls Club are millionaires profiting from our own stupidity and ignorance.
I wonder how many of the three attackers above (who were all in their 20s) watched any of these shows? How many times had they seen, over the years, how it was ok to act on emotions and not think things through first? And more importantly, when do we begin to demand that our children see something better on tv than this crap?
President Obama stated that, not only do his daughters not watch tv during the week, but he would not allow them to watch Keeping Up with the Kardashians, to which Kim K. decided to respond that their show was educational for young girls...REALLY?!?????? In what world? Maybe I need to take the blue pill to see the "educational benefit" of anything related to the Kardashians, but I say thank you to President and First Lady Obama for doing what so many parents aren't doing...parenting. I won't get on my soapbox with this but, it starts at home folks. Showing your children what is right and wrong and, more importantly, NOT allowing them to see such foolishness on television, listen to it on the radio, or see it in you as a parent will help to prevent another person (not just a student) losing their lives because someone else "just lost it."
I'll leave you with a feature I did for USA Today College recently on "5 Things Every College Professor Wants Students (and Parents) to Know," which includes conflict resolution.
Til next time!
Unfortunately though, I have to bring light to a subject that many college-bound and current undergraduates are dealing with. This past weekend, a Frostburg State University student was killed by another student at an off-campus residence. The victim was trying to break up a fight between the attacker and another student, and was stabbed in the head.
I should also note that all parties involved in this incident were female. In September, you may remember me blogging about a Bowie State University student being murdered by her roommate after a fight over an iPod. It has come to my attention that there is a serious issue going on with our young women in this society. Then there is the murder of Jayna Murray in Bethesda, MD at a Lululemon store by her female employee who stabbed her over 300 times, then proceeded to tie herself up and claim that robbers vandalized the store and attacked them both.
I am the first to admit that I sometimes act on my emotions before thinking things through. I may say something that I wish later I'd counted to 10 and then addressed. Is it because I'm a woman? My boyfriend would say yes, but I do recognize it's a flaw that I work daily to address. However, even on my most emotional day, I've never acted in the type of rage that seems to easily fill in so many young ladies now. It's the kind of emotion that each of the three attackers in the incidents above claim allowed them to "black out" and not realize the extent of what they were doing.
That's a bunch of crap. The truth is that, we as a society are so desensitized to violence that we now think it's acceptable for people, and girls and young ladies, to carry themselves in a violent manner that it's acceptable for people to justify their actions by "I just snapped."
How many of you have watched The Real Housewives series, The Real World, Jersey Shore, Basketball Wives, Football Wives, Bad Girls Club, or the host of other "reality" shows that are overtaking EVERY SINGLE ONE of the television channels now? I confess that I've watched some of these, and commented on the sheer ignorance of not only the "reality stars" but us as a society for allowing network television to continuously feed us such nonsense that they package up as "entertainment" because they think we are too stupid to demand more.
The truth is, they are right. We are not holding our entertainment outlets accountable to us by providing programming that educates, entertains, and helps us grow as a people. Remember Family Ties, The Cosby Show, A Different World, Happy Days, Family Matters, The Wonder Years, etc.? While these all weren't designed to educate us, they were at least television shows that portrayed positive moral values, and characters learning a valuable lesson at the end of each episode (which somehow always brought the "feel-good-music" and "a-ha moment").
Now, young women become overnight celebrities not for their acting ability, but their ability to make the biggest scene, cause the biggest fight in public, or be the most drunk on television, or cause the biggest Twitter or Facebook feud. This is what so many of our teens and 20-somethings see and think is appropriate. Throwing drinks, fighting in public, getting loud, and making a fool of themselves and everyone else around them. It's ok because the Snookie's, J-Wow's, Evelyn's, Tami's, and Bad Girls Club are millionaires profiting from our own stupidity and ignorance.
I wonder how many of the three attackers above (who were all in their 20s) watched any of these shows? How many times had they seen, over the years, how it was ok to act on emotions and not think things through first? And more importantly, when do we begin to demand that our children see something better on tv than this crap?
President Obama stated that, not only do his daughters not watch tv during the week, but he would not allow them to watch Keeping Up with the Kardashians, to which Kim K. decided to respond that their show was educational for young girls...REALLY?!?????? In what world? Maybe I need to take the blue pill to see the "educational benefit" of anything related to the Kardashians, but I say thank you to President and First Lady Obama for doing what so many parents aren't doing...parenting. I won't get on my soapbox with this but, it starts at home folks. Showing your children what is right and wrong and, more importantly, NOT allowing them to see such foolishness on television, listen to it on the radio, or see it in you as a parent will help to prevent another person (not just a student) losing their lives because someone else "just lost it."
I'll leave you with a feature I did for USA Today College recently on "5 Things Every College Professor Wants Students (and Parents) to Know," which includes conflict resolution.
Til next time!
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